A new dress!

Thanks to the generous nature of my friends and family Toria gets to wear a "new" dress often.  This one is a particular favourite because the onsie is attached to the dress.  I think she feels more comfortable with a onsie covering her up.  I'm just guessing...

This is a pose she seems to strike often.  It's as if she sees the camera and goes to work.

She's growing.  So fast!  I can't believe how quickly she's moving into the clothes I set aside, just weeks ago, as "too big".  I've organised her closet from left to right, small to large clothes.  She's moving her way across way to quickly for my liking.

It's almost time to move her into her nursery.  Right now her crib is beside my bed.  I'm not... I mean... she's not quite ready yet.  Why rush these things.

We miss my parents.  The other day we skyped with them for over an hour.  I moved the laptop around so they could join me while I rocked Toria before bed.  I then plopped them in the crib and tilted the camera up so they could see her pretty new mobile.  I then tilted the camera down so they could watch her as she drifted off to sleep.  I then took them with me into the nursery to show them the little stuff that's changed since they were here.  It was nice.  Course I realised later I hadn't really given them a choice... I just carried them around with me as I went about my evening.  I love skype in combination with my laptop.  I'll be more pleased when they make their way back here in October.

Your world or mine?

Something changes when you become a parent. Well lets face it, everything changes but what I mean is, something changed in me tonight as I cradled a tired little Toria in my arms before setting her gently in her crib. I felt as if I owned the world or rather I suddenly felt weighed down with responsibility for the state of the world. My sense of self shifted from living within this world of ours to building this world of ours. I'm no longer looking out for and dodging landmines I'm now challenged with finding and removing them. Knowing this is an impossible task, I feel a bit at a loss... like I've let her down already. I felt the same way last night when I caught the BBC world news. This is the down side to what I was feeling in my post from Oct 12 '09 "Expecting the much anticipated expected". Back then I wrote "I love, day to day, differently then I did. Just a subtle and slight difference. Just a little more fully. I love just a little more fully." I guess what I'm trying to explain (on a lot less sleep)... I love, day to day, differently then I did. It's so much more full which in turn makes it worrisome.

My sweet Toria, you're growing so fast.  Today you're two months, two weeks and 1 day old.  You're doing more and more every day.  You're now able to grab things and coo at me.  You're such a good baby.  Yesterday you spent your first day at Lac Philippe beach.  We had a nap together under the big white pines.  You smiled with delight while you slept.  There are no words to really explain how much you mean to your father and I.